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Friday, July 04, 2008

Game : Top Spin 3


Classification : G (Xbox360 | PS3 | Wii | DS)
Publisher: 2K Games (Xbox360 | PS3 | Wii | DS)
Developer: PAM Development (Xbox360 | PS3 | Wii | DS)
Genre: N/A
Reviewed on: PS3
Available on: (Xbox360 | PS3 | Wii | DS)
Price per platform: $99.95 (Xbox360 | PS3) $69.95 (Wii | DS)
Release dates: 27/06/08 (Xbox360 | PS3 | Wii | DS)

Score for this review : 7.9 / 10

by : Michael Butler

Somewhere between the hype and hoopla surrounding extreme sports and the saccharine-sweet allure of arcade sports games lies the genre’s fruitful middle ground. Home to games that just focus on their sport without any of the silliness that can infect titles at the far reaches of the spectrum.


Top Spin 3 sits firmly in this territory and it has a purity of focus that’s very reassuring. Top Spin is about as serious as you’d want a tennis game to be, with an extensive create-a-player system, play mechanics that reward forethought, a good eye for tennis, and what promises to be a vibrant online feature-set.

The character creation system allows you to work from templates or completely customise your character, from build and facial features to tattoos, outfits and playing styles. It’s an easy-to-use system and the detailed character models stand up to close scrutiny very well indeed. They also animate smoothly in play – they’re a little doll-like but their movements look natural, clothing and hair are procedurally animated (so they bounce and flutter more or less like the real thing) and the real-world players (a roster of current top players plus a few legends) are all easily recognisable.

Building up your character is also great fun. Stats are improved by playing matches, so once you’ve made a character and been to Top Spin School (training mode), you can get busy with the Career mode. The difficulty curve is well-judged so you should find yourself advancing at a steady rate, from amateur to pro to champion, with your in-game stats improving side-by-side with your real-world skills. Or if you’re impatient, you can skip character creation and just launch yourself into Tournament Mode, where you’ll play in a real-world tournament against a roster of real-world and in-game opponents.





(Online the game promises regularly-updated leaderboards and championships, including a World Tour mode with champions crowned every 15 days but we’ll have to wait until the game’s release to really test it out.)

So how’s the tennis then? It’s really good. If you’ve played any of the earlier games in the series, you’ll find that things have changed a fair bit as developer PAM decided to re-work Top Spin’s controls. Tennis is a highly tactical game and you’ll have to be thinking about the point you’re tying to construct as you play, because the key to hitting the shots you want to hit is to get yourself into position early and time your swing accurately.

To serve you can use the face buttons or the sticks to serve (pulling the right stick back to throw the ball and forward to strike it), and when it’s time to return a ball you press the button for the shot you want, get yourself into position, aim your shot and release the button as the ball bounces. The longer you’ve held the button and the more accurate your timing, the better the shot you make.

When it’s time to make the big play, you can use the triggers to modify your shot further by adding power, risk or both. It’s a great idea (and a series staple) but these shots are too hard to pull off – the timing is quite unforgiving. So instead of making the dramatic, desperate, attempt to hit a winner you’re more likely to play it safe, which is not, we suspect, what the developers had in mind.It really comes down to skill.

Casual gamers looking for a pick-up-and-play tennis game are likely to be disappointed by Top Spin 3. But for those who are willing to invest some time in coming to grips with the game’s controls, there’s a seriously good tennis game here that will deliver a lot of satisfaction.


Taken From : http://gameplayer.com.au




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Recipe : Chicken Salad Focaccia Sandwiches


* Prep Time 30 min.
* Cook Time -
* Serves 4
Recipe Provided By: Pillsbury Bake-Off®
Average (7 Ratings): 5 out of 5 stars

1. Ingredients

1. 1 (13.8 ounce) can Pillsbury(R) Refrigerated Pizza Crust
2. 2 tablespoons olive oil, or as needed
3. 2 cloves garlic, minced
4. 1/2 teaspoon coarse salt, or as needed
5. 1 1/2 teaspoons dried rosemary leaves
6. 1 (10 ounce) can chunk chicken in water, drained
7. 1/2 cup chopped celery
8. 1/2 cup mayonnaise
9. 2 green onions, chopped
10. 1 teaspoon dried tarragon leaves
11. 1/2 teaspoon prepared mustard
12. Dash garlic powder
13. Dash onion powder


2. Cooking Directions

1. Heat oven to 350 degrees F. Lightly spray cookie sheet with nonstick cooking spray. Unroll dough onto sprayed cookie sheet to form 12x10-inch rectangle. Starting with short end, fold dough in half; press lightly.
2. In small bowl, combine oil and minced garlic; mix well. Spread over dough. Sprinkle with salt and rosemary. Bake at 350 degrees F for 20 to 25 minutes or until edges are golden brown.
3. Meanwhile, in medium bowl, combine all salad ingredients; mix well. Refrigerate 15 minutes.
4. To serve, cut warm focaccia into 4 pieces. Split each piece to form 2 layers. Spoon and spread salad on bottom halves of focaccia pieces; cover with top halves to form sandwiches.

Yield: 4 servings

3. Still Hungry?

Super-fresh focaccia bread--home baked from refrigerated pizza crust--holds a tarragon chicken salad mixture.

Nutrition Info

Per Serving

* Calories: 625 kcal
* Carbohydrates: 49 g
* Dietary Fiber: 2 g
* Fat: 37 g
* Protein: 23 g
* Sugars: 6 g

About: Nutrition Info
Powered by: ESHA Nutrient Database

Taken From : http://food.yahoo.com


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Recipe : CHIPS AHOY!(R) Mudslide Pie


* Prep Time 20 min.
* Cook Time -
* Serves 10
Recipe Provided By: Kraftfoods.com

Average (27 Ratings): 4.5 out of 5 stars

Ingredients :

1. 20 CHIPS AHOY! Real Chocolate Chip Cookies, finely crushed
2. 1/4 cup margarine or butter, melted
3. 1 quart coffee ice cream, softened
4. 1 cup thawed COOL WHIP Whipped Topping
5. 1/2 cup fudge ice cream topping
6. 4 CHIPS AHOY! Real Chocolate Chip Cookies, coarsely crushed


Cooking Directions:

1. Mix finely crushed cookies and the margarine until well blended. Press firmly onto bottom and up side of 9-inch pie plate to form crust.
2. Spread ice cream into crust. Freeze at least 6 hours or until firm.
3. Top with the whipped topping just before serving; drizzle with fudge topping, then sprinkle with the coarsely crushed cookies. Store leftover pie in freezer.

Yield: 10 servings
Prepare as directed, using mint chip ice cream.

Nutrition Info

Per Serving

* Calories: 465 kcal
* Carbohydrates: 45 g
* Dietary Fiber: 1 g
* Fat: 28 g
* Protein: 6 g
* Sugars: 33 g

About: Nutrition Info
Powered by: ESHA Nutrient Database
Taken From : http://food.yahoo.com


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Thursday, July 03, 2008

Movie : Space Chimps


MPAA Rating: G

Theatrical Release: Jul 18, 2008 Wide

Starring: Andy Samberg, Cheryl Hines, Jeff Daniels, Patrick Warburton, Kristin Chenoweth
Director: Kirk De Micco
Screenwriter: Kirk De Micco, Rob Moreland
Story: Kirk De Micco
Producer: John H. Williams, Barry Sonnenfeld
Composer: Chris Bacon
Screenplay: Simon Goltsman, Kirk De Micco
Distributor: 20th Century Fox
Film Genre: Comedy, Adventure, Animation
Country: USA

by Alex Billington

Space Chimps Trailer

Yet another classic case of a non-Pixar animated movie looking unimpressive. This will play well with kids, I get that, but that's where it fails - it doesn't play well with everyone, no matter their age. Space Chimps is a new animated movie hitting theaters this summer being developed by a new company called Vanguard Animation. The story is about Ham, the grandson of the first chimp astronaut, who gets blasted off into space in order to rid a far-away planet of its nefarious leader. It may be worth your time to check out this trailer - at the least, you will appreciate Wall-E and Kung Fu Panda a lot more.

Space Chimps is directed and co-written by Kirk De Micco, who wrote Racing Stripes and Quest for Camelot and is making his directorial debut. Shrek producer John H. Williams and Enchanted producer Barry Sonnenfeld are both producing this film. Space Chimps will arrive in theaters on July 18th this summer.



Taken From : http://www.firstshowing.net








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Music : Motley Crue "Saints of Los Angeles"




Producer(s): N. Sixx, DJ Ashba, J. Michael
Label: Eleven Seven Music
RELEASE DATE: 24 June 2008
DISCS: 1 disc
GENRE(S): Rock, Metal
Rating : 8.0 out of 10

Having been to hell and back, can the Crüe still kick ass?
by Jim Kaz

Mötley Crüe is one resilient beast. Think about it, besides Axl Rose, who was the press's biggest target during the alt-music boom of the '90s? The band became the bastard poster-children for all that was overblown and excessive in the music biz and experienced a backlash of epic proportions.

But the Crüe has always demonstrated an uncanny ability to bounce back and has made a series of tactical maneuvers that have gradually put it back in the public eye—most notably, the release of its literary sleaze-fest and NY Times bestseller The Dirt. And when the timing was right, the band reunited with all four original members and embarked on a successful comeback tour a couple years back that helped to further cause. But now…is the world ready for a brand-new Mötley Crüe studio album? If the colossal amounts of soot, sarcasm and swagger on this new disc are of any indication, it damn well better be.

Based on the salacious tales oozing outta The Dirt, the band's latest sonic outing is decisively bad-ass. The sound is big with thick, chunky layers of guitars, elaborate intros, eerie effects and plush vocal harmonies. What's different here is the production, which is slick and very contemporary sounding—some of the stuff is pretty similar to what you might hear on your local alternative-rock station these days. That aside, at its heart, it's still very much of a Mötley Crüe album. First, there are the unmistakable vocals of Vince Neil. But what ultimately separates this from the horde of angsty alt-metal bands on the airwaves are the ballsy riffs and overt attitude problem—two things Mötley Crüe has always excelled at. This is far from sensitive, introspective stuff. And as always, Nikki Sixx shoots straight from the crotch with little regard for critical examination or art-house acceptance. And that's not something just anyone can pull off convincingly; it takes skill and years of self-abuse.

While the hunger of the band's early days has subsided a bit, there are still a few traces of its more human side. "What's It Gonna Take" details earnestly, the desperation of dealing with the whole seedy business and trying remaining true, while "Down At the Whiskey" is a soulful slide down memory lane. The title track and "Goin' Out Swingin'" are loud and anthemic and sound as if they could've been lost outtakes from the Dr. Feelgood sessions (the band's last mega-album). But all is not golden though, and one only need look so far as some of the titles for clues.

"Mother*cker of the Year" comes across forced and sound-wise, does little to augment the proceedings. "Chicks = Trouble" is by-the-numbers cock rock that is neither deviant nor clever. Then, there's the pilfering. Nikki Sixx is obviously an avid student of pop culture and takes full advantage of rock 'n' roll's long-held tradition of recycling. The opening intro "L.A.M.F." is either an homage to glam/punk icon Johnny Thunders or has been cleverly co-opted by virtue of its first two letters. Then there's "Welcome To the Machine," to which, Pink Floyd fans may be a tad pissed. These few indiscretions are by no means terminal and the album has enough solid hooks and soulful sentiments to carry it through. It may be damaged beyond repair, but there's plenty of heart to go around.

Mötley Crüe has reestablished itself with a new generation hungry for the heady days of the decadent and debauched—before grunge, smart drinks and henna tattoos. While it'll never be on par with Shout at the Devil, at least Saints of Los Angeles serves up sufficient amounts of sleaze, and should do well to indoctrinate a whole new generation of derelicts. Listen at your own risk.

Taken From : http://music.ign.com



Audio CD (June 24, 2008) Original Release Date: June 24, 2008
1. L.A.M.F.
2. Face Down In The Dirt
3. What's It Gonna Take
4. Down At The Whisky
5. Saints of Los Angeles (Gang Vocal)
6. Mutherf*cker of the Year
7. The Animal In Me
8. Welcome To The Machine
9. Just Another Psycho
10. Chicks = Trouble
11. This Ain't A Love Song
12. White Trash Circus
13. Goin' Out Swingin'





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Wednesday, July 02, 2008

Game : Kung Fu Panda (PS3)




Release Date: 6/3/2008
Platforms:
Publisher: Activision
Developer: Luxoflux Corp
Genres:
ESRB: E10

User Score
7.9

A fine title for any budding gamer.
by Erik Brudvig

Traditionally, videogames based on movies have several extra hurdles to leap over on the way to store shelves. Tight budgets, quick production schedules and the need to release alongside the movie whether or not the game is ready often result in less than stellar offerings for us gamers. Luxoflux, the team behind the Kung Fu Panda videogames, may or may not have had to face these challenges but if it did, the studio took them on in an intelligent manner. The production values are high, the graphics are clean and crisp, and the action even has some depth to it. This money well spent may be the cause of the game's single major issue: Somehow the game is only about twice as long as the film (depending on your skill set) but costs five times more than seeing it in the theater.


So anybody that plays videogames on a regular basis can probably skip this one. The ride is short and there isn't much challenge to make completing the game feel rewarding. But then, core gamers aren't the target audience. Po the Panda and his crew of master ninja animals were designed by Dreamworks with the young and young at heart in mind and the videogame is no different. The game is rated by the ESRB as being fit for everyone 10 and older, but this game is fine for any young fan of the movie

Kung Fu Panda follows the black and white hero with a TMNT-esque vocabulary across 13 brief stages, some featuring moments from the movie and others made specifically for the game, on his quest to become the Dragon Warrior and save the world from the over-ambitious Tai Lung. It's the inspirational story you've watched a thousand times in cartoon form: A young character has a dream, but isn't the traditional fit for that role. With a little perseverance and a bit of believing in himself, he beats all odds and becomes the hero. Everyone goes home feeling happy. Or in the words of Po, everyone feels "totally awesome."

Like all pandas, Po makes use of his natural gifts to take on the obstacles put in front of his oversized belly. His natural gifts, of course, have to do with his portly shape. He can do simple attacks and combos or start using some Chi to do belly bashes, roll around like a bowling ball or bounce enemies around with his gut. In between levels, players can spend coins to upgrade these moves, as well as unlock extra costumes or boost Po's stats.

Reptiles are always evil.
It's the kind of gameplay all designers shoot for when they make games for kids, but rarely hit the sweet spot the way they do with Kung Fu Panda. The action is simple and easy to get into, yet still offers a bit of depth for those looking for a tad more. Most levels have primary and secondary missions, setting a low bar but encouraging players to excel with unlockable rewards. There's a nice mix of action too, splitting the game up into combat, light exploration, and platforming, keeping things from growing repetitive and stale. Gamers will even find themselves briefly taking control of a few other characters including the zippy Master Shifu to spice things up.

The real success in Kung Fu Panda is that it has a look and feel that isn't too far away from what you'd expect out of the movie itself. From the high quality lighting effects to the smooth combat animations, there's a lot to like here. It's not perfect -- there are occasional animation hitches when climbing and grappling and the game does reuse environments -- but the style and execution are high quality. The sound and voice work is also of a high quality. The sound-alike voice actors put on performances befitting of the target audience and the effects aren't half bad.

Kung Fu Panda features a small set of multiplayer mini-games to keep the whole gang occupied…as long as the gang is limited to four people. It's all offline, which is a bit of a drag, and several of the game features and modes must be unlocked by collecting special coins in the single player game. The mini-games range from traditional brawlers in the vein of Super Smash Brothers (but not nearly as good) to a Kung Fu Panda themed Reversi. These distractions have the same level of polish as the main game, but aren't as much fun.

Taken From : http://ps3.ign.com/

A worthy foe.

Closing Comments
Kung Fu Panda is a brief romp, but one that will keep young gamers interested from start to finish. Heck, maybe they’ll even play through it a second or third time. Just remember, the title won’t do much for anybody that would consider themselves a regular gamer. If you happen to have a young child, niece or nephew that liked the movie, give this a rent or a purchase. They’ll thank you later.










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Tuesday, July 01, 2008

Recipe : Cola Pork Chops


SUBMITTED BY: JUST_PEACHY
PHOTO BY: Dee

"This is a tried and true recipe for pork chops, but it works great using chicken too. With chicken, cooking time is more like 40 minutes for thick breasts."

number of stars

READ REVIEWS (266)

PREP TIME 10 Min
COOK TIME 1 Hr
READY IN 1 Hr 10 Min
SERVINGS & SCALING
Original recipe yield: 8 servings
US METRIC

INGREDIENTS

* 1 cup ketchup
* 1 cup cola-flavored carbonated beverage
* 2 tablespoons brown sugar
* 8 pork chops
* salt and pepper to taste

DIRECTIONS

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C).
2. Mix together the ketchup, cola and brown sugar.
3. Place pork chops into a baking pan and pour cola mixture over, coating well.
Sprinkle with salt and pepper.
4. Bake for about one hour depending on the thickness of the pork chop.

NUTRITION INFORMATION

Servings Per Recipe: 8

Amount Per Serving

Calories: 173

* Total Fat: 6.4g
* Cholesterol: 37mg
* Sodium: 379mg
* Total Carbs: 14.9g
* Dietary Fiber: 0.4g
* Protein: 14.2g

About: Nutrition Info

Powered by: ESHA Nutrient Database

Taken from : http://allrecipes.com


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Recipe : Marinated Baked Pork Chops


SUBMITTED BY: Kim
PHOTO BY: RYANJENN

"My family loves this recipe. It is quick and easy, and makes for a tasty weekday supper. I often double the sauce to serve over rice."DETAILED NUTRITION
number of stars

READ REVIEWS (351)


PREP TIME 15 Min
COOK TIME 1 Hr
READY IN 1 Hr 15 Min
SERVINGS & SCALING
Original recipe yield: 6 servings
About scaling and conversions

INGREDIENTS

  • 1 tablespoon soy sauce
  • 2 tablespoons vegetable oil
  • 1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce
  • 1 teaspoon lemon juice
  • 2 tablespoons brown sugar
  • 2 tablespoons ketchup
  • 6 pork chops, trimmed
DIRECTIONS
  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C).
  2. In a small bowl, thoroughly blend soy sauce, vegetable oil, Worcestershire sauce, lemon juice, brown sugar, and ketchup.
  3. Place pork chops in a medium baking dish, and spread with 1/2 the sauce.
  4. Bake pork chops 30 minutes in the preheated oven. Turn, and spread with remaining sauce. Continue baking 30 minutes, or until internal temperature of the chops has reached 160 degrees F (70 degrees C).


DETAILED NUTRITION :

Serving Size 1/6 of a recipe
Servings Per Recipe 6

Amount Per Serving
Calories 275
Calories from Fat 151


% Daily Value *
Total Fat 16.8g 26 %
Saturated Fat 4.9g 24 %
Cholesterol 66mg 22 %
Sodium 290mg 12 %
Potassium 513mg 14 %
Total Carbohydrates 6.5g 2 %
Dietary Fiber 0.1g <>
Protein 23.3g 47 %
** Sugars 5.1g
Vitamin A 1 %
Vitamin C 3 %
Calcium 4 %
Iron 11 %
** Thiamin 91 %
Niacin 80 %
Vitamin B6 31 %
Magnesium 10 %
Folate 5 %

* Percent Daily Values are based on a 2,000 calorie diet. Your daily values may be higher or lower depending on your calorie needs.

** Nutrient information is not available for all ingredients. Amount is based on available nutrient data.

(-) Information is not currently available for this nutrient. If you are following a medically restrictive diet, please consult your doctor or registered dietitian before preparing this recipe for personal consumption.


Powered by ESHA Nutrient Database


Please read about our nutritional information


Taken from : http://allrecipes.com


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Movie : Mamma Mia!


Mamma Mia
Genre: Comedy, Musical, Romance
Starring:
Amanda Seyfried, Colin Firth, Meryl Streep, Pierce Brosnan, Dominic Cooper,
Director: Phyllida Lloyd
Producer: Judy Craymer, Gary Goetzman
Distributor: Universal Pictures
Release Date: July 18, 2008
Writer: Catherine Johnson based on the Musical MAMMA MIA! with music by ABBA

Synopsis

Meryl Streep leads an all-star cast in the feature-film adaptation of the beloved musical that has been seen by more than 30 million people in 160 cities and 8 languages around the world. Bringing the timeless lyrics and melodies of iconic super group ABBA to movie audiences, Summer 2008 is the season for Mamma Mia!


The three women who created the worldwide smash stage hit—global producer Judy Craymer, writer Catherine Johnson and director Phyllida Lloyd—repeat their roles in bringing this joyful, musical story to the big screen. The Mamma Mia! film is produced by Judy Craymer and Gary Goetzman.

Pierce Brosnan, Colin Firth, Stellan Skarsgård, Christine Baranski, Julie Walters, Amanda Seyfried and Dominic Cooper join Streep in this celebration of a mother, a daughter and three possible dads.

An independent, single mother who owns a small hotel on an idyllic Greek island, Donna (Streep) is about to let go of Sophie (Amanda Seyfried), the spirited daughter she’s raised alone. For Sophie’s wedding, Donna has invited her two lifelong best girlfriends—practical and no-nonsense Rosie (Julie Walters) and wealthy, multi-divorcee Tanya (Christine Baranski)—from her one-time backing band, Donna and the Dynamos. But Sophie has secretly invited three guests of her own.

On a quest to find the identity of her father to walk her down the aisle, she brings back three men from Donna’s past to the Mediterranean paradise they visited 20 years earlier. Over 24 chaotic, magical hours, new love will bloom and old romances will be rekindled on this lush island full of possibilities. Inspired by the storytelling magic of ABBA’s songs from “Dancing Queen” and “S.O.S.” to “Money, Money, Money” and “Take a Chance on Me,” Mamma Mia! is a celebration of mothers and daughters, old friends and new family found.

Taken From : http://www.celebritywonder.com/








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Movie : Meet Dave



Yahoo! Users 5 stars

Awaiting Release: 7/11/2008

Synopsis:

A massive fireball from space hits New York's Central Park and an ordinary man emerges unscathed. The man turns out to be a spaceship operated by 100 human-looking aliens who are one-quarter inch tall and seeking a way to save their planet; complications ensue when their captain falls in love with an Earth woman who's always picked losers for previous romances.


Full Cast & Crew

Theatrical Release
7/11/2008
Studio Credit
20th Century Fox Studio
Director Credit
Brian Robbins Director
Cast Credit
Eddie Murphy Dave
Gabrielle Union - Cast
Ed Helms - Cast
Elizabeth Banks Gina
Judah Friedlander - Cast
Pat Kilbane - Cast
Brandon Molale - Cast
Marc Blucas - Cast
Austyn Myers Josh Morrison
Nick Berman Rich
Production Credits Credit
Marc Turtletaub Producer
David Friendly Producer
Todd Komarnicki Producer
Jon Berg Producer
Production Companies Credit
Deep River Productions (TV) Production Company
GWIAB Production Company
Distribution Companies Credit
20th Century Fox Distribution Domestic Theatrical Distributor
Writer Credit
Bill Corbett Screenplay
Rob Greenberg Screenplay
Accounting Credit
Joel Tokarsky Accountant - Payroll Accountant
John Catron Production Accountant
Art Department Credit
Aric Cheng Set Designer
Robert Greenfield Jr Set Decorator
Beat Frutiger Art Director
Clay A Griffith Production Designer
Angela Stauffer Art Department Coordinator
Mark Boucher Set Dresser
Casting Credit
Juel Bestrop Casting Director
Seth Yanklewitz Casting Director
Choreography Credit
Fatima Robinson Choreographer
Film Camera Credit
Clark Mathis Director of Photography
Tony Olivieri Assistant Camera
Music Credit
Mark Angostino Music - Music Playback Operator
Jennifer Hawks Music Supervisor
Physical Effects Credit
Andy Gill Stunt Coordinator
Chaz Brewer Stunts
Production Management Credit
Steve Barnett Post-Production Supervisor
Sean Gowrie Production Coordinator
Tom Hammel Production Manager
Chris Baugh Location Manager
Lars P Winther Assistant Director
Kathleen Courtney Production Supervisor
Douglas Plasse Assistant Director
Publicity Credit
Paulette Dauber Publicity
Sound Credit
Richard Bryce Goodman Sound
Visual Effects Credit
Garry Elmendorf Special Effects Supervisor
Stephanie Allen Visual Effects Producer
Mark Stetson Visual Effects Supervisor
Wardrobe Hair Makeup Credit
Melanie Hughes-Weaver Makeup Artist
Adrien Morot Special Makeup Effects
Ruth E Carter Costume Designer


Taken From : http://www.hollywood.com


Reviewed by Josh Tyler : 2008-07-10 04:26:12



The frustrating thing about Eddie Murphy is that even though he keeps making terrible movies, it isn’t because he’s somehow less intrinsically talented than he used to be. He’s not Chevy Chase, he still has something to offer, it’s just that he’s inexplicably decided to use whatever talent he has left in the tank on the most horrible comedy projects Hollywood has to offer. What makes it even more bizarre is that he’s chosen to do this. It’s not like he has stopped earning and he’s forced to take anything and everything he’s offered in order to pay off all the back taxes he owes Uncle Sam, lest he end up on a cot next to Wesley Snipes. Eddie Murphy has options, yet he has intentionally chosen to make movies like Norbit and now from the same director Meet Dave.

It’s only because the people involved in it are indeed so naturally talented that Meet Dave is not a laughter destroying, soul sucking, a-bomb. It’s merely blah. The cast here is far better than a movie like this deserves. Eddie Murphy leads a group of microscopic aliens who have come to Earth riding inside a spaceship which looks, oddly enough, exactly like Eddie Murphy. Eventually, they name their spaceship Dave. Dave’s crew includes great talents like the ever-sexy Gabrielle Union, Office asshole Ed Helms, and 30 Rock hat wearer Judah Friedlander. They’re on our planet looking for some sort of probe, which their people sent here to steal our oceans. The probe is in the possession of a 5th grader whose mother, played by Elizabeth “some day I’ll regret having this movie on my IMDB page” Banks, accidentally hits Dave with her car and starts dating him, completely unaware that he’s actually a hollow vehicle operated by dozens of tiny little dudes.

Here’s where I turn this review into a massive conspiracy theory, because what I haven’t told you about the plot is that a good portion of it seems to have been stolen from a cartoon. Pinky & the Brain in particular, popular in the late to mid-90s on the Warner Brothers TV network. Come on, you remember it. Super-intelligent lab rat and his super-stupid mouse sidekick escape from their lab every night and try to take over the world? Narf? Well several of their adventures involved a robot constructed by The Brain and designed to look exactly like a human. Brain and Pinky would then drive around in the robot interacting with mankind as if they were one of us, all the while plotting our doom. Sound familiar yet? Hey, it’s the plot of Meet Dave. It’s not just the concept that’s straight of a Pinky & the Brain episode, I’d swear it’s some of the actual, individual scenes are too. Maybe there are only so many places you can go with tiny creatures driving around in a robot human, but the similarities are hard to ignore, even the dialogue at times feels like something taken straight out of The Brain’s mouth. Ironically, it’s the parts of the film which seem most like a Warner Brothers cartoon that work best.

See, I’m not going to try and tell you that nothing in this movie works. It does, in places. There are some legitimate laughs, most resulting from rather juvenile gags revolving around language confusion. Eddie Murphy is funny. Even if the script is not, he is, and in more than one spot he and the rest of his talented cast overcome the movie’s deficiencies to deliver the odd chuckle. Unfortunately no matter how many laughs Murphy and the gang manage to squeeze out of this concept, there’s still the story which, couldn’t possibly be more poorly executed. At every turn Meet Dave chooses the stupidest direction to go, as if it doesn’t know it’s a live action movie and thinks it’s still a cartoon about two escaped lab rats. There’s this completely braindead MacGuffin involving the crew turning into gay flamingo dancers, just because they see us and apparently we’re so awesome, it makes aliens want to join a Rocky Horror revival. Worse, the whole thing gets pretty preachy by the end, devolving into one of those standard, lesson learned messages about how love and emotion conquer all. It’s beyond cheesy. No one ever seems to mention that all this wonderful human love and emotion also tend to get a lot of people killed. Crimes of passion? Anyone? Maybe they should have just gone with animation, it couldn’t possibly have looked worse than some of these special effects.

Look, Meet Dave is exactly what you’d expect from any modern Eddie Murphy film. It’s a pile of generic crap which manages, in spite of itself, to deliver a few laughs. Maybe it’s a little more ambitious than some of his more recent stuff and it’s certainly less blatantly evil than Norbit, but that doesn’t matter. As a human being you know instinctively whether or not you’re the right audience for it. If you are, buy a ticket and then hate yourself in the morning. I understand. I’m not going to judge you for it. At least he’s not Chevy Chase.












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